No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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