so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
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