I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize
