i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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