wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
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