Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize
