"it" just moved
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
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