brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
