Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize