hell yes lets make some ravioli
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize