it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
