There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
