Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
You left your phone here
Wait...
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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