Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
Randomize
