Need sex. Gaining weight.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Randomize
