if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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