Me too!
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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