At least make sure they are 18
Why
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
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