fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
