im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I booty called her while she was in labor.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Randomize
