when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
