Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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