i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize