i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Randomize
