And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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