nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Randomize
