What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I need a burrito and a hug.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
