i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
it's like heaven, but drunker
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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