oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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