I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
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