i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
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