he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Randomize
