It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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