So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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