Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Randomize
