Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
