Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Randomize
