would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Randomize