using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
Randomize
