Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
