I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
