I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
