guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Randomize
