actually, I'm a sock model
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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