At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Randomize
