just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Randomize
