I hate all girls vehemently.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize