is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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