Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize