I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
