Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Randomize