Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.