My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
Randomize
